I can’t really pinpoint when or why it happened, but I just felt this urge to journal while I was in the midst of an unhappy relationship.
“… then curiosity will ask you to turn your head a quarter of an inch and look at the thing a wee bit closer. Do it. It's a clue. It might seem like nothing, but it's a clue. Follow that clue. Trust it. See where curiosity will lead you next.”
There was nothing that my ex was doing physically or emotionally to keep me from leaving. I did have a lot of built up anger about the lazy stoner I was dating, and journaling was just a way for me to vent my frustrations.
I journaled almost every day, about how HE wasn’t doing anything to change, how my life was boring because his biggest thrill was to stay at home and play video games, and how my dreams of travelling and living abroad were not coming true because of HIM.
After taking a break from my ex for about a year to live abroad in Italy in 2015, I went back to Canada and my egoistic self eventually returned to him too, because I believe that it was the right thing to do. It was during that time that I started following the clues.
I wanted to know how I could live a life in which I could travel, but still get paid while doing it. That is how it starts really, it starts with a thought. This thought eventually led me to different Facebook groups who changed my views on what it meant to earn a living. As I observed the various women in the various groups that I joined, I continued to journal and to take notes. I took note of how they read various books on mindset, I observed how they increased their education, not by attending some fancy school, but through trial and error and using their gifts to create their own business, follow their passion, do work they loved and to create wealth while doing it.
I too decided to follow in their footsteps. I started working with different mindset coaches who helped me to see that I was worthy of achieving everything that I wanted to achieve. The more I observed how others were not living the usual 9-5 life, the more I explored the kind of life that I wanted to live. That included a life without my boyfriend.
After months and months of working with my coaches, I eventually left my ex, and I took a trip to visit a few friends in Europe for 3 months. It was during that trip where I got the idea to write my book.
Upon my return to Canada 3 months later, I continued to develop the idea for my book, and something inside me told me to go through my past journals. When I did, I was shocked. I discovered the person who kept me from living the life that I wanted to live was ME. I looked back at my past entries, and I couldn’t believe that I was the person writing those journal entries. It was in looking back on those entries I was able to see how I grew. My biggest lesson was that I was the one who held on to my negative mindset.
This is why I encourage everyone to keep a journal. Some people tell me that they don’t know what to write about. I like to do what I call “Minddumps”. Write down anything that’s on your mind, anything that triggers you or causes any kind of anxiety or pain. Just write it out.
Go back to what you’ve written after some time has passed and look at what you wrote. Is there a common theme that comes up? If so, follow the clues. You may discover a book, an online support group, or even a friend that could help you to understand what you’re going through a little bit better. Overtime, as you continue to write, learn and grow, you’ll eventually notice how you also transformed your mind.
That is how writing can take you from a negative to a positive mindset. All you have to do is start writing and from there you’ll become aware of your inner voice, or what I now refer to as God. Whether or not you want to change is entirely up to you. However, if you keep going through life year after year dealing with the same struggle, that is your clue that there is something deeper going on inside you. If that case, follow the clue, write it out, and renew your mind.
Melissa F Giancola is an English teacher and author of “The Inner Work: Journey In Process”.
After spending a life changing year living abroad in Italy, Melissa returned to her homeland in Canada, with a different perspective on life in 2016. Travelling around Italy and Europe opened her eyes to the possibility of living a life that was the different than the usual 9-5 life she was used to.
She wanted to make a change which would help her to travel and live out her dreams. Throughout the spiritual and personal process, she learned to shed many of the limiting thoughts and people which prevented her from the success she craved.
Her own spiritual and personal development is what led her to writing her debut book, in which she shares with her readers to get started on their own journey.
Melissa's book is out NOW! Check it out here.